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> Pedestrian Quotes, ...what have you herd?
bOnEs
post May 10 2008, 06:06 PM
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so, what have you herd on the streets of liberty city that had you cracking up? i've herd a ton of one-liners but, last night i started writing them down because i usually forget what they were later... so, here's a couple things i herd last night that made me laugh..

...a taxi driver after a car gets in his way while taking me somewhere...
"i bet thats a fucking woman!"

...and some dude at a pay phone after i bumped into him...
"everyone wants to touch me... why?"

This post has been edited by bOnEs: May 10 2008, 06:08 PM


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QUOTE (Massacre @ Mar 15 2011, 01:24 AM) *
Oh, good one. The "you're on the internet so you must have no life" insult isn't moronic or unoriginal at all. You must, without a doubt, be a very important member of society, not at all a waste of the already barely valuable gift of life.

As is the case for everyone who takes issue with people who make them sad on the internet, you are one of two kinds of people:

You are exactly what you claim I am, and that is a lonely, pathetic basement dweller. You life is spent eating eight pounds of junk food per day, masturbating to anything you find online that's even remotely feminine, and wishing you had good looks and social skills. You continue to live with your mother until she dies of a combination of lung cancer and liver failure brought on by the chain-smoking and heavy drinking she used to cope with what a failure you are. Your mother mercifully dead and free of the living embodiment of failure she regretfully thrust from her loins, the bills start to pile up and you, unemployed and unable to pay these bills (of course), lose the house and everything in it. Somehow even more of a failure than you already were, you wander from place to place eating out of dumpsters and sleeping in your own filth until you finally die of AIDS, which you contracted from a diseased whore you scrounged up enough money to pay for, so you could finally lose your virginity while at the same time pretending that your mother was back in your life.

Or:

You are the type who was an athlete in high school, who was genetically doomed to be an idiot but managed to finish school and even get a college scholarship because you were so good at a worthless children's game. You went off to college with a suitcase full of polo shirts and condoms, the polo shirts, because you're a douche, and the condoms to prevent you from impregnating the dim-witted young college girls whom you could never touch without the aid of Rohypnol, a drug you refer to as "roofies" because you can neither spell or pronounce Rohypnol. You scrape by with borderline D's for the next four years, and leave the campus to go out into the real world where your realize you're not intelligent or talented enough to do anything of value with your life. Misery and minimum wage ensues for thirty years, then you blow your brains out, and your corpse, alone and forgotten, is not discovered until the smell of rotting flesh seeps under your door and your bodily fluids finally soak through the floor of your studio apartment and into the room below you. Your body is cremated, the ashes scraped into a garbage bin because there was no one in your life who valued you enough to pay for a casket, funeral, or burial plot.

You're undoubtedly one of the two, otherwise you would have better things to do than complain about the theme of a forum that doesn't care about anything you have to say.
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In Kontrol
post May 10 2008, 06:09 PM
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I haven't taken any notice of the pedestrians quotes but I'm about to play it now so I'll note some down!

(With a keyboard of course!)

This post has been edited by In Kontrol: May 10 2008, 06:13 PM
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FuddMan
post May 10 2008, 06:17 PM
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...a random woman talking on the street...
"there's nothing funny about urinary tract infections!"


--------------------
QUOTE (Psy)
Well, I must be honest, I do occasionally have the odd night off where I stick my fingers in as many pussy's as I can
php stands for psy humping pussy


zomg it's DuffMan's clone.
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I Made Your Mom ...
post May 11 2008, 01:12 AM
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I've heard this one a few times now, but I love it when the southern cop says:

"Dispatch, the dumbass is on foot!"


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Gutbomb
post May 11 2008, 01:36 AM
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"Oh no, they done killed another truth seeker!" - anonymous NPC
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The_Technician
post May 11 2008, 01:57 AM
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anyone know if there are any quotes from old games in this one?

i havent really been playing attention to the city or its inhabitants, as i've been going full on singleplayer or multiplayer so i havent been wrapped up in the cities life, but all i know is that Liberty City is like New York on crack...


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Since 24.03.08
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BioSphere
post May 11 2008, 06:22 AM
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-- Quit Touching Me! -- a hobo on the sidewalk yells it every now and then when you bump into them.

-- Did you just grab my ass? -- Some random Girl

-- Cheesey Vagina -- that one gets on my nerves... i hear it so much.

-- Drunk People are people too! --

-- I have worms --

-- Would you like to see me with my clothes off? --

thats all that i can remember right now.


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GTA IV - 100% Completed
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prelude11
post May 12 2008, 11:37 PM
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Once when I was dropping Packie off at home, he was walking back to his house and got hit by a car and the driver said "I should never drive when I'm high again"
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buttocks
post May 12 2008, 11:57 PM
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one bum says something like "nooo i dont have any carrots!!!!"
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NIGGALICIOUS
post May 13 2008, 02:22 AM
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"Damn Thats a fine ass"

"i dont care if she was 12 her tits were huge" ped on phone

"yep... im still drinking"

"holy fuck"

"it only burns when i pee and all i do is pee.... oh the pain"


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glowworm
post May 13 2008, 01:17 PM
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some random guy to a hooker, "i can smell your labia from here." i laughed pretty hard at this one.
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bOnEs
post May 13 2008, 03:18 PM
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doesn't play well with others...
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...a hot blonde after i bumped into her...
if you want to grope me, just ask...


--------------------



QUOTE (Massacre @ Mar 15 2011, 01:24 AM) *
Oh, good one. The "you're on the internet so you must have no life" insult isn't moronic or unoriginal at all. You must, without a doubt, be a very important member of society, not at all a waste of the already barely valuable gift of life.

As is the case for everyone who takes issue with people who make them sad on the internet, you are one of two kinds of people:

You are exactly what you claim I am, and that is a lonely, pathetic basement dweller. You life is spent eating eight pounds of junk food per day, masturbating to anything you find online that's even remotely feminine, and wishing you had good looks and social skills. You continue to live with your mother until she dies of a combination of lung cancer and liver failure brought on by the chain-smoking and heavy drinking she used to cope with what a failure you are. Your mother mercifully dead and free of the living embodiment of failure she regretfully thrust from her loins, the bills start to pile up and you, unemployed and unable to pay these bills (of course), lose the house and everything in it. Somehow even more of a failure than you already were, you wander from place to place eating out of dumpsters and sleeping in your own filth until you finally die of AIDS, which you contracted from a diseased whore you scrounged up enough money to pay for, so you could finally lose your virginity while at the same time pretending that your mother was back in your life.

Or:

You are the type who was an athlete in high school, who was genetically doomed to be an idiot but managed to finish school and even get a college scholarship because you were so good at a worthless children's game. You went off to college with a suitcase full of polo shirts and condoms, the polo shirts, because you're a douche, and the condoms to prevent you from impregnating the dim-witted young college girls whom you could never touch without the aid of Rohypnol, a drug you refer to as "roofies" because you can neither spell or pronounce Rohypnol. You scrape by with borderline D's for the next four years, and leave the campus to go out into the real world where your realize you're not intelligent or talented enough to do anything of value with your life. Misery and minimum wage ensues for thirty years, then you blow your brains out, and your corpse, alone and forgotten, is not discovered until the smell of rotting flesh seeps under your door and your bodily fluids finally soak through the floor of your studio apartment and into the room below you. Your body is cremated, the ashes scraped into a garbage bin because there was no one in your life who valued you enough to pay for a casket, funeral, or burial plot.

You're undoubtedly one of the two, otherwise you would have better things to do than complain about the theme of a forum that doesn't care about anything you have to say.
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PabloHoneyOle
post May 13 2008, 03:25 PM
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CHEESY VAGINA FTW
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wilren08
post May 13 2008, 04:14 PM
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well, i put on the gray suit, the one that have the red shirt openned, pretty 80 style and some ped told me...
¨Hey, the 80´s called, they want they clothes back¨.
Of course i killed him afterwards. in a sadistic way i may add. smile.gif

This post has been edited by wilren08: May 13 2008, 04:17 PM
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Grand Master Pei...
post May 13 2008, 05:55 PM
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The guy who sells hot dogs from his hot dog stand:

Come take a bite of this hot chihuahua meat! My dogs is long and HOT!
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buttocks
post May 13 2008, 07:30 PM
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the guy from burger shot has some funny quotes but i am too lazy to type them out
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42yearoldinvestm...
post May 13 2008, 11:57 PM
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I heard a guy whose horn did not work say "beep beep"
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mattyg
post May 14 2008, 02:18 AM
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Definately Cheesy Vagina and I can smell your labia from here....ftwzzz


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Iscariah
post May 14 2008, 05:38 AM
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QUOTE(Grand Master Pei Mei @ May 13 2008, 07:55 PM) [snapback]1435196[/snapback]
The guy who sells hot dogs from his hot dog stand:

Come take a bite of this hot chihuahua meat! My dogs is long and HOT!


The same guy also yells sometime: Wouldn't anybody fucking buy something?!?!

thumbup.gif


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Lee
post May 14 2008, 05:45 AM
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It was a while ago now but I had a Mancunian say something like "Do that again and I'll fuckin' hav ya"


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