That's right folks, a brand spanking new joke topic! So come on by for your daily dose of funnies...
| Q: In the movie, "Lord of the Rings" why does the Ring of Power glow?|
A: Because it gets fingered by the Hobbit.
|Q: What is the difference between a priest and a homosexual?|
A: The way they say ahhhh-men.
|A man walked into an ice cream shop...|
Man: I'd like some chocolate ice cream.
Scooper: I'm sorry sir, but we're out of chocolate. Would you like something else?
Man: Yes, I'd like some chocolate ice cream.
Scooper: I'm sorry, but we don't have that. Would you like to try a different flavor?
Man: Um... yes. I'd like some chocolate ice cream.
Scooper: We don't have that. How about a different kind of ice cream?
Man: I'll have some chocolate ice cream.
Scooper: Look, Mister, can you spell the “van” in vanilla?
Scooper: Can you spell the “straw” in strawberry?
Scooper: Can you spell the “fuck” in chocolate?
Man: But there is no “fuck” in chocolate!
Scooper: That's what I've been trying to tell you!
|One day Lone Ranger and his side kick Tonto were out riding when Lone Ranger had to take a piss. So Lone Ranger goes over to the bush pulls down his pants and then he screams. He runs over to Tonto and says, "Tonto I've been bitten by a snake on my penis go to town and ask the doctor what to do."|
So Tonto rides to town and goes to the doctor and says "Doctor, Lone Ranger has been bit by a snake what do I do?"
The doctor looks at Tonto and says, "You take a knife and make an x on the spot where he was bit, then you suck out the venom."
Tonto thanks the doctor and rides back to Lone Ranger and Lone Ranger asks "What did the doctor say?"
Tonto looks at Lone Ranger and says "Doctor say you gonna die!"
|Q: What does Britney Spears and pepsi have in common?|
A: They both come with plastic jugs!
|Two junior co-eds went to the movies one night. After 15 minutes passed one girl leaned over and whispered to her friend, "What should I do? The guy sitting next to me is masturbating."|
Her friend replied, "Don't do anything. Just ignore it."
The first girl said, "I can't."
Her friend, "Why can't you ignore it?"
The first one says, "Because he's using my hand!"