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> Mass Effect 2 [spoilers ftw]
Heartless
post Feb 18 2010, 11:47 PM
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I've been playing this game now for about a month, and I have to say that I'm fairly disappointed, what with all the hype it received. Everything it sets out to do, and that's a lot, it fails at miserably. The meat of the game is the FPS side, which is an undeniable throwback to about 20 years ago. The reticle is permanently frozen in first person hell, which never changes even if you manage to figure out a way to change the camera. Why is this a problem? Because if, and this happens a lot, one of your bumbling sidekicks mange to stand just so over your shoulder and behind you, all your bullets some how manage to hit them. Aiming is equally wonky and at random, where the game itself doesn't understand it's own programing. This means fighting Geth huskers with a shotgun is as equally pointless as fighting them with a pistol. When they charge at you, you'd think the visual cone effect would scatter the shots from your gun and hit multiple targets, but this is never the case. And further, if they get too close, once again the reticle forces you to hit whatever it is currently sitting on, rather then what you're actually aiming at. Med Gel only exists for the benefit of your cohorts, who are too retarded to use it themselves and resurrect you when you inevitably perish. This creates an odd scenario where it's far easier to force them forwards and fight till they die, bring them back, and continue. Since the enemies don't give XP, your buddies have infinite ammo and can be resurrected whenever, it often means that difficult fights find shepherd cowering in a small dark corner, waiting for the bad guys to go away.

The game is riddled with annoying bypass attempts and ridiculous hacking terminals, which tend to sabotage your entire game if you fail any of them. Say you fail at one that has a hidden tech inside, and you don't realize this, and you can never go back to it even if you could have a second chance, this could mean that later in the game half your squad dies. The bypass one is really hard, with only a small margin of success, and it wouldn't be so bad if it just wasn't so important to nail every single one of them. The hacking is moronic in simplicity, making one wonder why they ever put it in the first place. To add insult to injury, the last mini game, the resource scanning missions, is tedious and laughable, as you'll soon find yourself wasting mindless hours scouring the worlds for imaginary rocks you can't sell or trade anywhere. And remember, if you miss a single upgrade, anywhere, everyone dies at the end. And don't get any lofty ideas about giving all the upgrades to the team and none for yourself; even if you kill everyone on the last levels, you die too. Again. So remember, upgrade or else!

The big draw to the game is the conversations, which at times were inspired and rich, but mostly just repeated and recycled over and over again. Legion makes the best comments, at least for me, but it really isn't anything no-one else says either. The main aggravate in this system is the dippy renegade/paragon system, that you can use if you gain more points in them, but can't use if you don't have enough points. Which in turns means that it becomes incredibly stressful to not only gain points but also to use them. And remember, if you don't use either, horrible, horrible, horrible things will happen. Like Legion/Tali becoming disloyal, or any number of rewards or story-lines being lost.

The missions were straight forward and formulaic, with all the loyalty missions just being rewashed versions of each other. No matter what happens, someones parent is evil, they have deep psychological torment and they endlessly make things worse for themselves at home. Yay.

Why am I still playing?


--------------------



QUOTE (Qdeathstar @ Mar 13 2009, 01:45 AM) *
The reason is that when heartless says something stupid, he really means it and believes it.

“They refer to me as an uneducated barbarian. Yes, we are barbarians. We want to be barbarians, it is an honored title to us. We shall rejuvenate the world. This world is near its end.”

Die Zeiten haben sich geändert.
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Massacre
post Feb 19 2010, 06:18 PM
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The only problem you've mentioned that I've had is the husks running up on you, it's hard to get far enough away from them to get a shot off, I usually have to melee them. I don't feel like the mission are repetitive at all, and I don't see any reason to trade or sell the minerals, the upgrades are more than worth it. I've only scanned four planets and I've gotten enough materials to have most of the upgrades.

I've never had trouble with aiming or hacking. Are you playing on PC? PC controls are always wonky compared to console controls.


--------------------
QUOTE (Darth Sexy @ Sep 12 2009, 03:43 AM) *
Massacre, you make me look like a rational, moral, kind person.
QUOTE (Marney1 @ Oct 26 2009, 01:22 PM) *
Massacre - What you've just posted is sick and disturbing...
QUOTE (ViceMan @ Jan 17 2010, 04:22 PM) *
When Massacre is around, everything is violated... Whether it likes it or not.
QUOTE (ViceMan @ Mar 6 2011, 09:40 AM) *
Whenever I think of "human resources" Massacre immediately springs to mind.


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Heartless
post Feb 19 2010, 07:47 PM
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QUOTE (Massacre @ Feb 19 2010, 01:18 PM) *
The only problem you've mentioned that I've had is the husks running up on you, it's hard to get far enough away from them to get a shot off, I usually have to melee them. I don't feel like the mission are repetitive at all, and I don't see any reason to trade or sell the minerals, the upgrades are more than worth it. I've only scanned four planets and I've gotten enough materials to have most of the upgrades.

I've never had trouble with aiming or hacking. Are you playing on PC? PC controls are always wonky compared to console controls.


Yeah, I'm on a PC. What do you mean the missions aren't repetitive? Shepherd, I have to go find the father/sister/son/clan/asylum I never knew, and btw, you're gonna get shot at. A lot. Now quick, run through this rat maze, have a few conversations and pick up the data pad. Pepper in some obligatory renegade/paragon actions and you have a mission. Hell, now that I think about it, the only missions you really do are the two revolving around the characters themselves and then the final suicide mission. Sure there's about 10 distress signals, but there's never a good time to get them done because you can't access more relay jumps at the start, and when you open all the map, the pressure is on to go and fight the bugs. Oh, and don't forget the ton of assignments, which make me feel like some chump bagboy for the mob.

Sure, it's a beautiful game, but I still don't understand why we all dress like we're in the XFL.


--------------------



QUOTE (Qdeathstar @ Mar 13 2009, 01:45 AM) *
The reason is that when heartless says something stupid, he really means it and believes it.

“They refer to me as an uneducated barbarian. Yes, we are barbarians. We want to be barbarians, it is an honored title to us. We shall rejuvenate the world. This world is near its end.”

Die Zeiten haben sich geändert.
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Massacre
post Feb 19 2010, 08:08 PM
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What are they supposed to wear? Khaki's and a polo shirt aren't really space-faring attire.


--------------------
QUOTE (Darth Sexy @ Sep 12 2009, 03:43 AM) *
Massacre, you make me look like a rational, moral, kind person.
QUOTE (Marney1 @ Oct 26 2009, 01:22 PM) *
Massacre - What you've just posted is sick and disturbing...
QUOTE (ViceMan @ Jan 17 2010, 04:22 PM) *
When Massacre is around, everything is violated... Whether it likes it or not.
QUOTE (ViceMan @ Mar 6 2011, 09:40 AM) *
Whenever I think of "human resources" Massacre immediately springs to mind.


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Heartless
post Feb 19 2010, 08:35 PM
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All I'm really thinking of when I play the game:






Posted by Yatzee.


--------------------



QUOTE (Qdeathstar @ Mar 13 2009, 01:45 AM) *
The reason is that when heartless says something stupid, he really means it and believes it.

“They refer to me as an uneducated barbarian. Yes, we are barbarians. We want to be barbarians, it is an honored title to us. We shall rejuvenate the world. This world is near its end.”

Die Zeiten haben sich geändert.
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Massacre
post Feb 21 2010, 12:11 AM
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You need thick armor to stop lasers, apparently. If you look like an idiot, so be it. It probably doesn't help that I gave Shepard Deadpool's color scheme.


--------------------
QUOTE (Darth Sexy @ Sep 12 2009, 03:43 AM) *
Massacre, you make me look like a rational, moral, kind person.
QUOTE (Marney1 @ Oct 26 2009, 01:22 PM) *
Massacre - What you've just posted is sick and disturbing...
QUOTE (ViceMan @ Jan 17 2010, 04:22 PM) *
When Massacre is around, everything is violated... Whether it likes it or not.
QUOTE (ViceMan @ Mar 6 2011, 09:40 AM) *
Whenever I think of "human resources" Massacre immediately springs to mind.


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Massacre
post Feb 22 2010, 05:38 AM
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FUCK.

You've beaten it, right, Heartless? How'd you get through the part with Joker? I get killed every time, and I've got that Jew cripple going as fast as he can go.


--------------------
QUOTE (Darth Sexy @ Sep 12 2009, 03:43 AM) *
Massacre, you make me look like a rational, moral, kind person.
QUOTE (Marney1 @ Oct 26 2009, 01:22 PM) *
Massacre - What you've just posted is sick and disturbing...
QUOTE (ViceMan @ Jan 17 2010, 04:22 PM) *
When Massacre is around, everything is violated... Whether it likes it or not.
QUOTE (ViceMan @ Mar 6 2011, 09:40 AM) *
Whenever I think of "human resources" Massacre immediately springs to mind.


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Heartless
post Feb 22 2010, 07:35 AM
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QUOTE (Massacre @ Feb 22 2010, 12:38 AM) *
FUCK.

You've beaten it, right, Heartless? How'd you get through the part with Joker? I get killed every time, and I've got that Jew cripple going as fast as he can go.


Oh that. As soon as you leave the cockpit, charge into the medical office as fast as your polio riddled legs can hobble. Aim for the far back right corner and be prepared for a bug to come in through the engine window. Mash whatever button you use for accepting an action. If I remember right, that should drop you into the AI Control room. Do the console thing, and then hop down another bunny hole, off in a corner. This should put you in the very last room.

Something is missing though, I forgot what. I remember Kelly getting tentacle raped in the elevator. Check the Mass Effect Wiki.


--------------------



QUOTE (Qdeathstar @ Mar 13 2009, 01:45 AM) *
The reason is that when heartless says something stupid, he really means it and believes it.

“They refer to me as an uneducated barbarian. Yes, we are barbarians. We want to be barbarians, it is an honored title to us. We shall rejuvenate the world. This world is near its end.”

Die Zeiten haben sich geändert.
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Massacre
post Feb 22 2010, 05:12 PM
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Yeah, despite everything I read telling me to haul ass, you have to wait for the Collectors' shadows to pass before climbing the stairs. I worked hard on this shit, Joker (Seth Green, obviously) is one of the few Jews I actually want to keep alive.

I got killed the first time because I stopped to watch Kelly get dragged off.

This post has been edited by Massacre: Feb 22 2010, 05:15 PM


--------------------
QUOTE (Darth Sexy @ Sep 12 2009, 03:43 AM) *
Massacre, you make me look like a rational, moral, kind person.
QUOTE (Marney1 @ Oct 26 2009, 01:22 PM) *
Massacre - What you've just posted is sick and disturbing...
QUOTE (ViceMan @ Jan 17 2010, 04:22 PM) *
When Massacre is around, everything is violated... Whether it likes it or not.
QUOTE (ViceMan @ Mar 6 2011, 09:40 AM) *
Whenever I think of "human resources" Massacre immediately springs to mind.


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Heartless
post Feb 22 2010, 07:17 PM
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Yeah. The bugs will leave you alone, mostly, so long as you stay out of their range. Oddly, I don't remember ever fighting them.


--------------------



QUOTE (Qdeathstar @ Mar 13 2009, 01:45 AM) *
The reason is that when heartless says something stupid, he really means it and believes it.

“They refer to me as an uneducated barbarian. Yes, we are barbarians. We want to be barbarians, it is an honored title to us. We shall rejuvenate the world. This world is near its end.”

Die Zeiten haben sich geändert.
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Massacre
post Feb 22 2010, 11:32 PM
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I always died right at the top of the stairs, everything else was fine. Just because Joker's a cripple he can't carry a gun?


--------------------
QUOTE (Darth Sexy @ Sep 12 2009, 03:43 AM) *
Massacre, you make me look like a rational, moral, kind person.
QUOTE (Marney1 @ Oct 26 2009, 01:22 PM) *
Massacre - What you've just posted is sick and disturbing...
QUOTE (ViceMan @ Jan 17 2010, 04:22 PM) *
When Massacre is around, everything is violated... Whether it likes it or not.
QUOTE (ViceMan @ Mar 6 2011, 09:40 AM) *
Whenever I think of "human resources" Massacre immediately springs to mind.


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Heartless
post Feb 22 2010, 11:33 PM
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QUOTE (Massacre @ Feb 22 2010, 06:32 PM) *
I always died right at the top of the stairs, everything else was fine. Just because Joker's a cripple he can't carry a gun?


What stairs? And yeah, he does carry a gun. Just not when you play as him.


--------------------



QUOTE (Qdeathstar @ Mar 13 2009, 01:45 AM) *
The reason is that when heartless says something stupid, he really means it and believes it.

“They refer to me as an uneducated barbarian. Yes, we are barbarians. We want to be barbarians, it is an honored title to us. We shall rejuvenate the world. This world is near its end.”

Die Zeiten haben sich geändert.
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Massacre
post Feb 22 2010, 11:41 PM
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Towards the end of the "mission," when you reach the area where Jack stays, you have to climb the set of stairs to get to the core.

In other news, I can't believe I'm actually having trouble deciding whether to fuck Jack or Tali...


--------------------
QUOTE (Darth Sexy @ Sep 12 2009, 03:43 AM) *
Massacre, you make me look like a rational, moral, kind person.
QUOTE (Marney1 @ Oct 26 2009, 01:22 PM) *
Massacre - What you've just posted is sick and disturbing...
QUOTE (ViceMan @ Jan 17 2010, 04:22 PM) *
When Massacre is around, everything is violated... Whether it likes it or not.
QUOTE (ViceMan @ Mar 6 2011, 09:40 AM) *
Whenever I think of "human resources" Massacre immediately springs to mind.


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Heartless
post Feb 23 2010, 12:09 AM
Post #14


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QUOTE (Massacre @ Feb 22 2010, 06:41 PM) *
Towards the end of the "mission," when you reach the area where Jack stays, you have to climb the set of stairs to get to the core.

In other news, I can't believe I'm actually having trouble deciding whether to fuck Jack or Tali...


I don't think you can fuck Tali, and fucking Jack means she'll most likely die at the end of the game.


--------------------



QUOTE (Qdeathstar @ Mar 13 2009, 01:45 AM) *
The reason is that when heartless says something stupid, he really means it and believes it.

“They refer to me as an uneducated barbarian. Yes, we are barbarians. We want to be barbarians, it is an honored title to us. We shall rejuvenate the world. This world is near its end.”

Die Zeiten haben sich geändert.
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Massacre
post Feb 23 2010, 12:14 AM
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Tali has offered to fuck me once she figures out a way to up her immune system so that she can survive taking off her suit. I'm intrigued, as I went through the entire first game before I found out I couldn't fuck her, so this is going to have to make up for it.

Is it weird that I didn't consider fucking Miranda for even a second? I have a second character planned and she's going to be a lesbian, so I'll fuck Miranda then.


--------------------
QUOTE (Darth Sexy @ Sep 12 2009, 03:43 AM) *
Massacre, you make me look like a rational, moral, kind person.
QUOTE (Marney1 @ Oct 26 2009, 01:22 PM) *
Massacre - What you've just posted is sick and disturbing...
QUOTE (ViceMan @ Jan 17 2010, 04:22 PM) *
When Massacre is around, everything is violated... Whether it likes it or not.
QUOTE (ViceMan @ Mar 6 2011, 09:40 AM) *
Whenever I think of "human resources" Massacre immediately springs to mind.


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Heartless
post Feb 23 2010, 12:31 AM
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QUOTE (Massacre @ Feb 22 2010, 07:14 PM) *
Tali has offered to fuck me once she figures out a way to up her immune system so that she can survive taking off her suit. I'm intrigued, as I went through the entire first game before I found out I couldn't fuck her, so this is going to have to make up for it.

Is it weird that I didn't consider fucking Miranda for even a second? I have a second character planned and she's going to be a lesbian, so I'll fuck Miranda then.


I just read up on it, and you can fuck Tali. The best ones are Miranda, Kelly and Garrus. Miranda and Kelly show the most flesh, and Garrus is funny as hell. Mordin will tell you that ingesting Turian tissue will cause an allergic reaction in Shepherd. Later, you go for the painkiller and medicine. lol. That's right, you sucked Turian cock.


--------------------



QUOTE (Qdeathstar @ Mar 13 2009, 01:45 AM) *
The reason is that when heartless says something stupid, he really means it and believes it.

“They refer to me as an uneducated barbarian. Yes, we are barbarians. We want to be barbarians, it is an honored title to us. We shall rejuvenate the world. This world is near its end.”

Die Zeiten haben sich geändert.
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Massacre
post Feb 23 2010, 12:35 AM
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I didn't know you could fuck Kelly. I thought you had dinner with her and that was it. I'm also curious as to what a Turian cock looks like...


--------------------
QUOTE (Darth Sexy @ Sep 12 2009, 03:43 AM) *
Massacre, you make me look like a rational, moral, kind person.
QUOTE (Marney1 @ Oct 26 2009, 01:22 PM) *
Massacre - What you've just posted is sick and disturbing...
QUOTE (ViceMan @ Jan 17 2010, 04:22 PM) *
When Massacre is around, everything is violated... Whether it likes it or not.
QUOTE (ViceMan @ Mar 6 2011, 09:40 AM) *
Whenever I think of "human resources" Massacre immediately springs to mind.


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Heartless
post Feb 23 2010, 12:39 AM
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QUOTE (Massacre @ Feb 22 2010, 07:35 PM) *
I didn't know you could fuck Kelly. I thought you had dinner with her and that was it. I'm also curious as to what a Turian cock looks like...


Dunno, but Mordin says it causes chafing. And yeah, you can see her ass. With Miranda, you can see her in her bra.


--------------------



QUOTE (Qdeathstar @ Mar 13 2009, 01:45 AM) *
The reason is that when heartless says something stupid, he really means it and believes it.

“They refer to me as an uneducated barbarian. Yes, we are barbarians. We want to be barbarians, it is an honored title to us. We shall rejuvenate the world. This world is near its end.”

Die Zeiten haben sich geändert.
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Massacre
post Feb 23 2010, 12:50 AM
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I just found out that a female Shepard can only fuck male characters and vice-versa. So much for my lesbian character.


--------------------
QUOTE (Darth Sexy @ Sep 12 2009, 03:43 AM) *
Massacre, you make me look like a rational, moral, kind person.
QUOTE (Marney1 @ Oct 26 2009, 01:22 PM) *
Massacre - What you've just posted is sick and disturbing...
QUOTE (ViceMan @ Jan 17 2010, 04:22 PM) *
When Massacre is around, everything is violated... Whether it likes it or not.
QUOTE (ViceMan @ Mar 6 2011, 09:40 AM) *
Whenever I think of "human resources" Massacre immediately springs to mind.


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Heartless
post Feb 23 2010, 01:00 AM
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Kelly is the only Lesbian option I am currently aware of. Further, if you kill Samara and replace her with Mordin, you can have sex with her and die. [game over]

Also, if you hack the game and force characters into your squad, they have hidden conversations you couldn't otherwise access.


--------------------



QUOTE (Qdeathstar @ Mar 13 2009, 01:45 AM) *
The reason is that when heartless says something stupid, he really means it and believes it.

“They refer to me as an uneducated barbarian. Yes, we are barbarians. We want to be barbarians, it is an honored title to us. We shall rejuvenate the world. This world is near its end.”

Die Zeiten haben sich geändert.
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