Who-wee, a fucking cherry blast. It always hurts the first time, right? Better go do some fucking heroin and forget I was here.
So I was in a public restroom at the mall yesterday.
I saw a guy's feet in a stall when I walked in, and there was a very stinky smell so I am assuming he was taking a major dump. So I got real quiet for a little bit and let everything settle down, you could hear a faint grunting sound and the ever so slightly 'kerplunk' of a turd dropping from the anus. Other that this guys shit, you could hear a pin drop.
Then I let out this war cry as loud as possible and threw myself against his stall door as hard as I could causing a loud bang. I bet that guy hasn't been that scared in his life because he yelled in a very surprised fashion and said "WHAT THE FUCK!" really loud and stand up, I could hear him fumbling with his pants because his belt buckle was making noise.
I was long gone befire he made it out of the stall though.